You can’t imagine it, the singer states. At that moment gearing up for her comeback record in eight years, ecstatically in love with her recent boyfriend, and at long last the mother of a toddler after facing fertility challenges for a decade, on top of the world. Then in spring she was told she had breast cancer.
The singer-songwriter, actual name Jessica Cornish, is renowned for speaking her mind. The record, the provocatively titled album, was intended as an open book, addressing every moment of pain she’d endured since she last recorded music (endometrial issues, losing a baby, failed relationships, gaslighting, suicidal thoughts) with her usual frankness. The lead track, the song No Secrets, was dropped in the spring. But by then there existed a huge secret. Her diagnosis. Later next release, Living My Best Life, came out in May and Cornish was talking to press about how she was living her best life, while all the while dealing with her cancer. Subsequently she shared the news, and in early July she had a mastectomy.
She shoots me her best “Are you kidding?” look. “I come out with a song called the track No Secrets. I’m conducting every press talk, and they ask, ‘Any updates?’ and I respond, ‘Well, not much…’” the singer has just had to postpone shows because she’s still waiting for follow-up surgery.
We’re at a studio in the capital. She is dressed in a tan faux-leather coat, jeans with elaborate white patches, beige footwear and large glasses. Think motorcycle style meets vintage look. “As if I’m in the 70s and I should have a man with facial hair.” Easy Rider, I say, thinking of the picture. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She grins. Cornish is fast-thinking, unfiltered and direct. She says she has always wanted to try comedy and is planning to attempt her first comedy performance soon. “I love making people laugh. On stage I often tease the crowd.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
The artist was preparing for an performance at the ceremony when she discovered a mass. “I quickly sought to get it examined, had an scan, and they were, like, ‘It looks like nothing; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I insisted, ‘Yet I sense it. I have arm pain and tingling in my hands whenever I rise.’ And they said, ‘We should biopsy it?’ It happened on March 28, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The doctor told her if it was concerning she’d reach out on the Monday. By then she had convinced herself it was okay. The way she describes it, it was simply too inconvenient to receive a diagnosis when she had so much on.
“Just two weeks before from releasing the album after years away and an extended break. And the doctor messaged and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I thought, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I log in expecting it’s all going to be fine, and she informs me, ‘Please take a seat.’ The solemn tone? And she reveals, ‘Unfortunately but your biopsy results have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” How did you respond? “I answered, ‘Well, that’s not great. That’s not fucking great timing.’ My initial thought was, ‘My child depends on me.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She found the surgery frightening and surreal. “I fear going under. You’re escorted. During crises you roll down in a bed, but now I just strolled down with a hospital gown and my bum hanging out. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, she notes, she’s been lucky. Without chemo or radio, just the surgery. “Cancer is awful, but yet Luckily it was detected early. I had the mastectomy recently and my one side now resembles a grapefruit under a tight bedsheet.” She smiles again. “At least the nipple remains.”
The subsequent surgery is both medical and cosmetic. Her breasts, she remarks, are now “different sizes. The size doesn’t match. How rude! I reflected, why make it worse, I’m already having a rough time. How offensive! Ironically I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be perfect. Illness changed that.”
Previous Struggles
She is familiar with health problems. She thinks her outlook on her diagnosis has been so upbeat because she’s experienced in health crises. They have often coincided with peak moments, serving as a tap on the shoulder, or blow, to make her recall not to be complacent. “Truly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘Things going well? Hold on.’ Ever since I was a child, it has always gone alongside high points for me; a major or strange event has happened to my health.”
She takes me back to her 11-year-old self, already beginning featuring in the stage in Whistle Down the Wind (she was cast at the age of nine). That’s when she was found to have the medical problem WPW, which can cause a tachycardia as well as dizziness and heart flutters. “I rehearsed between visits on an IV drip, and going back into hospital at night.” She skips forward six years, and 17-year-old Jess has entered the girl group Soul Deep while attending the academy. “I secured a deal, and I had a brain incident. Then when I was ready to debut in recently I had a automobile accident and my voice box shifted and I lost my voice for a long period.”
Oi, I say, wait, I need a moment. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees
